Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
