So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
