I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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