Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
