he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
