If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
try to milk me bitch
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