so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
