sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
You work out of a Hotel?
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Randomize
