I am puke
i just google imaged poop.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
