were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
