A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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