Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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