if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
