Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
