somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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