Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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