Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize