i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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