check it out our google latitudes are spooning
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Randomize