The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Randomize
