ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
His hands were made for my vagina.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
