2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
