Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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