Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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