I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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