if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
