Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
