Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
