Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Randomize