I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize