i can't believe i had my finger in that
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Randomize
