i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
