Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
