they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize