There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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