Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
