Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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