just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
The struggles of a small town man whore
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize