Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
