By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
