i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Will exercising make me less horny?
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