chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
