my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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