Cold hands, warm shart.
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
whose ass print is on the piano?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
