she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize