just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
