ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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