It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Randomize
