I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
