I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
